Question

basis. 6.6 Clichés, Slang, Buzzwords, and Wordiness ary (Obj. 2) YOUR TASK Revise the following sentences to avoid trict confusing clichés, slang, buzzwords, and wordiness. a. Although our last presentation bombed, we think that who beyond the shadow of a doubt our new presentation will fly. pple b. If you will refer back to the budget, you will see that there are provisions that prevent blowing the budget. Chapter 6 Revising Business Messages 147

please answer this question- to remove the slangs and buzz works and wordiness.

Answer 1

a) Although our last presentation failed, we think that our new one will be a success.

"bombed" is replaced with "failed" as it is a slang.

"beyond the shadow of a doubt our new presentation will fly" is replaced with "our new one will be a success" to remove slang and wordiness.

b) If you refer back to the budget, you will see that there are provisions that prevent the budget to fail.

"will" is removed.Because in a conditional clause, If you have future tense (will) in the second half, you will have a present tense in the first half.

"blowing the budget" is replaced with "budget to fail" to remove slang.