Question

Please read the article below and answer:

Did the article confirm or change your knowledge or ideas? What did you already, did any of the information confirm your previous knowledge or cause you to change the way you thought about the topic. Please use quotes from the article. Thank you

Infertility—the inability to conceive a child after a year of unprotected intercourse—is far from rare. In affluent nations, it affects an estimated 1 in 6 couples. In poor countries, the statistics may be as high as 1 in 4. Moreover, infertility rates have been rising over the past half-century, due to sexually transmitted diseases in the developing world and the fact that so many developed world women today are delaying childbearing to their thirties and beyond (Petraglia, Serour, & Chapron, 2013).

infertility The inability to conceive after a year of unprotected sex. (Includes the inability to carry a child to term.)

While infertility can affect women (and men) of every age, just as with miscarriage and Down syndrome—as we know from the standard phrase, “the ticking of the biological clock”—getting pregnant is far more difficult at older ages. Within the first six months of trying, roughly 3 out of 4 women in their twenties conceives. At age 40, only 1 out of 5 achieves that goal (Turkington & Alper, 2001). Because of their more complicated anatomy, many of us assume infertility is usually a “female” problem. Not so! Male issues—which can vary from low sperm motility to varicose veins in the testicles—are equally likely to be involved (Turkington & Alper, 2001).

Infertility puts stress on both partners. Still, as the quotes at the beginning of this section suggest, this life trauma is apt to hit women hardest (Teskereci & Oncel, 2013). Although they are more immune from feelings of having personally failed (Herrera, 2013), males have pressures to prove their manhood by fathering a child. In one Danish questionnaire study, almost 1 in 3 patients at a male fertility clinic confessed that their condition affected their sense of masculinity and self-esteem (Mikkelsen, Madsen, & Humaidan, 2013).

The impact varies in intensity, depending on one’s culture. In places like Iran, where not being able to bear a child is sometimes an accepted reason for divorce (more about this in Chapter 11), infertility can leave a woman shunned by family and friends (Behboodi-Moghamdam and others, 2013). There may be a feeling of being socially isolated, even in the liberal West. Imagine going to dinner parties and needing to listen quietly as everyone at the table bonds around the joys and trials of having kids.

And, when you are in these situations, do you discuss your situation, or clam up? Revealing your problem to parents—especially those who are anxious for a grandchild—demands planning: As one woman reported: “They (my husband’s parents) live over 3 hours away and we didn’t want to start the conversation over the phone. And so we went to visit” (quoted in Bute, 2013 p. 172).

Does telling people help? If, and only if, you have a caring, social-support system, you may feel relieved by being upfront: “Yes, I’m trying to get pregnant but it’s not working, Mom” (Martins and others, 2013). But, the bottom-line message is that, in coping with infertility, having a supportive partner matters most (Darwiche and others, 2013). Read this lovely comment taken from another interview study conducted with long-time infertile women:

When I told him (my second husband) when we were dating that I could not have children, he said, “If god wanted me to have kids, he would have made me fall in love with a woman who could have them.”

(quoted in Ferland & Caron, 2013, p. 186)

Just as with the Biblical patriarch Abraham, whose decision to stay with Sarah is an ageless model for marital love, infertility can offer a chance to demonstrate a person’s loving commitment to a mate.

Today, communicating collaboratively around fertility issues is essential, as science offers couples so many options to help fulfill the quest to have a (partly) biological child.

Answer 1

The article confirms with most of my previous knowledge. However, it was refreshing to see a positive side of dealing with infertility which was new for me. It indeed changed my view. For example, "If god wanted me to have kids, he would have made me fall in love with a woman who could have them", is a demonstration of an extraordinary love, not limited to the reproductive abilities. As rightly said, a positive support system is what most needed in such situations and with the advancement in technology, one can look out for methods suitable for one.